Death is a life lesson

People always ask me what was my turning point?

I changed my life because I was tired of the meaningless existence I was living. Every weekend's drinking just became lame. I wanted more than that. I deserved more!

Death/grief have also been a major part of my transformation. My grandmother, who I was extremely close with and whom I adored, suddenly passed away 1 week before my 21st birthday. You see when someone you love dies; the world carries on. It doesn't pause on account of your pain or your loss. But if you are fortunate, people will acknowledge your pain briefly and send you their condolences. The finality of death shook me to my core. There's no do over. No second chance and no negotiation. No more opportunity. What people leave behind after their death is sometimes much more valuable than the lives they have lived and I'm not referring to material things.

For as long as I can remember I have always been told I'm different, weird or unusual by teachers, family, co-workers etc. For the most part I saw it as a negative. But after yet another experience with death, this time a very close friend who lost her battle with cancer in 2013, I looked in the mirror one day and decided that I needed to explore more of who I was beyond the weekend's temporary pleasures and beyond of course the layers of fat I was hiding behind.

At any given moment that you are not happy with who you are, you CAN evolve, you have the right to change or not. You CAN learn to love and find value in yourself. In doing so you will inspire others, maybe even just one person to embrace their unusual weird self (…insert your label….) Grief might have sparked my journey but ultimately love changed everything and that is the legacy I want to leave behind. There's an opportunity for change during hardship. You can allow it to make you bitter or you can allow it to make you extraordinary. Some of the above you may have heard or read of before. Transformation doesn't happen overnight, it starts with a single thought and followed up by action repeatedly.

Love Changes Everything
​Nicola x